The baby cries: listen carefully to understand how to best act
Crying is the only way for babies to let off steam. There is no need to panic every time the baby starts to complain: over time you will learn to understand the different types of crying, from the one that calls your attention to the crying. hunger signal! Sometimes, it can be an alarm bell for a nuisance, such as putting teeth. Find out in this video which are the most important stages in the development of the newborn!
Why are you crying?
Surely one of the most frequently asked questions by new mothers around the world. Until a moment ago my baby was calm, because all of a sudden he started screaming at the top of his lungs?
The truth is, he doesn't understand it well either. Take a step back and try to put yourself in his shoes.
You are a little creature that has to deal with a new world, after being 9 months safe in the belly of the mother. You have established a unique relationship with her, made up of trust and love. All of a sudden your world has become too small for you and you have come to light to know a much larger and adventurous, but utterly unknown space!
The only thing that comes naturally to you is to cry. It's really easy, and you already learned that inside your baby bump. Mom seems to communicate differently than yours, so you try to imitate her, but no one seems to understand your language. It's frustrating!
You try and try again, because in the end what interests you most is to stay with her. You attract her attention, she cuddles you a bit and then walks away ... oh no, that's not right!
Express again that you always want to be with her, you are a baby and this is how it works!
Who knows why you are using all the breath in your body (among other tiny ones) while those who take care of you are not. Once again, you turn to the only person you trust: mom, can you help me? Unfortunately they cannot show you my feelings with words, nor through gestures, I am still too young for these things.
You decide to give her another chance and try to modulate your attitudes according to need, an example? If you cry from hunger, you turn your head towards the chest of those who look after you, if you don't like it, you turn away or close the door. mouth.
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That's why it explodes all of a sudden
Now that you have taken a first step in understanding your child's attitude, you can begin to take note of the multiple needs to be met in a newborn and interpret the outburst according to the feelings you think they are experiencing. Don't be discouraged if this empathic activity is not immediate: becoming a mother is a slow process and there is no instruction manual!
Unlike what you think, most of the time a child does not cry to express pain or discomfort, but to draw attention to one or more needs that alone it cannot satisfy:
- Hunger, one of the most likely reasons why it will "go off the siren". This type of crying will be one of the very first you will recognize thanks to your maternal instinct, but also because it is characterized by a low intensity start, which will become stronger and more rhythmic. It is a very insistent cry that tests your patience and at times it is also accompanied by uncoordinated movements;
- Tiredness, this type of crying is also very common. If the baby is sleepy he will begin to complain emitting a whimper that will increase in volume, perhaps rubbing his eyes;
- Discomfort, associated with situations where the baby does not feel comfortable, such as having a dirty diaper or feeling too hot. These are events on the agenda, but fortunately the crying is not the most desperate and will stop when you have solved the problem;
- Contact with mom, or out of loneliness. A puppy would always want to be with the person who protected him for 9 months, but obviously this is not realistic. Crying is disconcerted, because when the mother is not around and cannot smell or see his face, the little one is very worried and agitated.
Early signs of hunger, fatigue and unpleasant temperature
It is true that the first means of communication for very little ones is crying, but some precise signals come to the aid of new mothers, to be grasped in time and thus avoid a nice outburst. You will notice them as you progress in time and learn about your child's habits, so be absolutely calm if it takes a while to pick them up.
Hunger, as for all human beings, is an important stimulus, and for newborns it is even more so. If the baby cries for this need, in reality you have already arrived late, as nature has provided him with an unconscious tool to give you a first indication: these are some small movements, such as squeezing your fists and bringing your hand to your mouth. Earlier, the baby may click his tongue or direct his head towards your chest, looking for the breast. Monitor these attitudes and you will see that you will reduce the number of appetite fits.
Tiredness is something we all have to deal with, and alas, infants are still unable to establish a proper sleep-wake rhythm. You can anticipate her need by noticing her discomfort when faced with colored stimuli or attempts at distraction, and also looking at whether her eyes are bright or if she yawns.
Feeling hot or cold is quickly resolved for adults, covering or sheltering in the shade of a cool place. Babies need you for everything, so check every couple of hours that the nappy is not too wet. and pat it close to the head to immediately tell if it is sweating or feeling cold.
What to do to calm the newborn
One of the most stressful activities of new parents is to try to reassure the little one of the house, rushing to cradle him during the crises that occur very often.
When you find yourself in your arms a dejected baby remember that the first thing to do is to observe him carefully and secondly to intervene promptly.
A correct interpretation of the cry and a timely action will make the little one feel safe and consequently make him grow stronger and stronger in the relationship with his parents.
Sometimes, however, the really difficult thing is the opposite, refraining from intervening: your support as a mother or father is not required in all cases of facts; crying can simply release the tension of the day. This often happens before falling asleep or after a few stimulating hours.
Try to wait a few seconds (even if it will seem like an "eternity), this step back will be really useful to understand the reasons behind your baby's crisis.
Finally, especially during the early stages of life, try to avoid the pacifier: in the first 40 days it is generally not recommended if you want to start a peaceful breastfeeding.
Of course, for those who breastfeed on demand, a child's request for help may seem like an infinite call to hunger and to feed, but as we have seen there are many different types of crying. Do not always offer milk, you would risk making the baby feel misunderstood and for your part you will feel more and more stressed and tired due to interminable feedings.
In summary, what is the right way to go to calm the baby?
Find a communication key with him, without being too schematic. Give him time to make himself understood to respond better. During his first weeks of life you will probably try, and that's okay, because they will help you in the path of knowledge of the little one: you have tried with milk, with a diaper change and with dry clothes, but nothing consoles him. Maybe he just needs your closeness, mostly physical at first, but over time visual and emotional as well.
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Crying out of pain: when to worry
Small children rarely cry for illness, but when the temperature rises and you have a fever, the rash is completely physiological. Even the healthiest babies have sporadic episodes of fever, so you have nothing to worry about. If the crying is particularly insistent and lasting over time, you can still contact the pediatrician who will visit him to identify possible causes of discomfort or pain that have triggered the hyperthermia.
Crying out of pain or discomfort is often acute and short-lived. There may also be apnea pauses and, unlike crying from hunger, instead of intensifying it tends to weaken. This is an alarm bell that tells you that the little one you are carrying has something wrong with it.
The pediatrician is the last resort; depending on the stage of life in which the infant is, there could be several reasons: an extremely frequent and cause of sleepless nights is the eruption of the first teeth. Around 6 months, give a check in the mouth, if you see a cut on the gum you have found the cause of the discomfort!
Finally, there is a cry for a very specific pain, that for colic, which deserves an explanation in itself.
Colic: inconsolable crying in the first trimester of life
Since your pregnancy you will have been bombarded with stories of new mothers and new fathers struggling with colic, a rather frequent and still little known cause of crying. It is estimated that 2-3 out of 10 babies still suffer from colic today. The children in question are completely healthy and have no particular pathologies.
With the term colic we go to indicate those sudden crying crises, inconsolable and extremely lasting over time that often are accompanied by tension in the abdomen, redness of the face and bending of the legs towards the belly.
Through these spasmodic movements, the newborn goes to emit gas from the intestine and it is no coincidence that colitic crying is also called gaseous colic crying.
For many years it has been established that a newborn suffers from colic if the crisis lasted for at least 3 hours straight, for at least 3 days a week; today the rule of 3 is an outdated yardstick.
The truth is that episodes of colic begin in the first weeks of life, usually around the third to sixth week after birth. They usually show up in the evening and seem to be quite on time.
Fortunately, the phenomenon is limited to the first quarter of life and is destined to disappear in the 4th month.
If your child suffers from these terrible crises, try to console him by staying close to him and get help in moments of greatest despair: patience is the key to everything!
At the clinics or online it is possible to take part in postpartum courses dedicated to massages that relieve colic pains.
