How To Get An Ex Back: Top 10 Tips To Succeed!
We know that when a relationship ends, you can find yourself in the position of wanting to do everything to win back your partner, often, even when it would not be a good idea. The first thing to do in these situations, although our goal is to get our him back as soon as possible, is to try to understand in a rational way if it can be a valid solution or if it is appropriate to move on, process the pain. and start taking back your life.
This implies a "careful analysis of your relationship and the reasons that led to the breakup, in an attempt to understand more deeply the reasons behind your desire. Here, for example, are some cases in which it would be good to avoid trying to regain a broken love. :
- if the decision was made by your ex boyfriend and he was very clear about the end of your relationship;
- if it is not so much him that you miss but rather a boyfriend and a love affair in general;
- if you continue to idealize your ex and their attitudes, refusing to see it clearly for what it is;
- if you have already tried to take steps for a rapprochement and they have not been successful, by the will of your ex.
If, on the other hand, you believe that your love still has a chance, there are no signs of total closure on the part of the ex partner and you have positive feelings about it, below we will provide you with the best tips to understand how to regain the love of your partner. your ex, without losing dignity.
In fact, the things we will say in this article are also valid for those who want some advice on how to conquer a man in general. And - beware, spoilers! - for a successful business, you must know right away that it is necessary to have a great deal of love for yourself.
And in this regard, the following is a useful video that warns us of not very virtuous attitudes to learn to love ourselves more and avoid running into the wrong people and toxic relationships.
1. Analyze the past relationship, any mistakes made and strengths
First try to look at everything with intellectual honesty, objectivity and rationality.
You need to try to understand specifically the dynamics and reasons behind the end of the relationship with your ex.
Everyone has undoubtedly their faults, but now concentrate on your possible mistakes and the behaviors that may be at the origin of the breakup. Looking inside and questioning oneself is a mature and fundamental step to try to grow and not run into the same dynamics. whether you resume your story, whether you continue your life with another person, it will undoubtedly be useful for you to avoid repeating mistakes or not very virtuous attitudes that are not good for the couple in general.
If you come back with him, even more so, you will have to try to eliminate them completely, so that you start off on the right foot. But be careful, he too will have to do his part.
But also try to focus on the strengths of your bond: those could be the basis from which to start again, both with him and with a possible new person.
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Questions to get to know each other: 10 questions to get to know a person better2. Arm yourself with time and patience
If you think you will definitely get what you want, you are on the wrong track. Life never gives certainty and the important thing is the path you will take, not always and only the result you will reach.
In this field, moreover, we are dealing with the desires and feelings of another person, so you cannot expect to get what you want at all costs. Cultivate patience, sow and always do useful things first of all also to yourself Remember that to reach your goal it is essential to work on yourself, a step necessary for your life and your inner and emotional growth.
What does this mean concretely? Do not put everything on standby for this purpose, continue to do your life, fill it with other commitments and your normal daily activities.
3. Focus on yourself and your things
It seems paradoxical but the center must be you: and this, paradoxically, will bring it closer to you and help you to regain it.
Show yourself focused on yourself, growing and happy even without him. In essence, take back your spaces and return to live at 360 degrees.
Go out with friends, go to the gym or do sports you love, pick up old hobbies and cultivate new ones, spend time with those you love, go on trips and whatever makes you feel good. This is the right time to get involved, start new experiences, adopt new attitudes and discover parts of yourself that have never been explored.
Also learn to feel good alone, something that will also help you as a couple to make a healthy, happy and lasting relationship work at its best.
4. Don't be on him
Avoid reminding him in a variety of ways that you are always there and waiting for a sign from him. Do not try to appear obvious and predictable: absence and mystery will only give him a bit of healthy curiosity.
This is the ideal way to make him miss you and possibly tickle the desire to see you, contact you and resent you. Even if he forces himself and doesn't want to take the first step out of pride, it may be that your silence prompts him to take action.
5. Also avoid the opposite excess: disappear completely!
If it is essential not to "stalk it", because it could get tired and put an end to it altogether, on the other you must not even completely disappear or, even worse, block it and eliminate all traces. Deleting it or blocking it from social networks can only communicate the message opposite, giving him an "excessive importance, which would inflate his ego, confirming his idea of always having you available.
If you can, avoid making strong gestures, go on with your life in a normal way and without falling into excessive counterproductive reactions. Seeing you calm, serene and intent on continuing your normal routine can only trigger a sense of discomfort in him, if he is still interested and willing not to let you go.
6. Social network: instructions for use
As anticipated, this point is rather fundamental and unsafe at the same time, which is why it needs extreme attention.
Sometimes it is precisely an unconscious use of these powerful means that makes things worse and communicates wrong messages or what we don't want to pass.
We have already said that it would be good to avoid blocking or deleting it: if you really can't, you could for example hide it from your Facebook homepage, so as not to see it too often and run into unnecessary suffering, jealousy and paranoia. he doesn't know. You can do the same with all his friends and relatives. Sure, you have to refrain from the desire to constantly spy on him, but knowing that this move will help get him back to you, you will certainly be more motivated and disciplined.
Then there are two attitudes to avoid:
- post compassionate statuses that show your malaise and suffering - you would arouse pain and no doubt would not attract her interest, sadly being a bit ridiculous.
- pretending to be forcibly happy, posting posts and statuses that don't match your true character and natural way of using social media. If you've always been moderate and shy with Instagram and cousins, avoid posting too many photos, documenting that you go out every night, and showing yourself with lots of male faces to show him you're going further. You could really lose it altogether as well as communicating a discordant "image, and therefore ridiculous and unnatural. If you have always been a social addict, then you should continue to keep your classic behavior. Your ex needs to understand that you are moving on with your life. without too many upheavals and earthquakes.
7. A pinch of jealousy wouldn't hurt ...
It is true that we don't have to do small psychology, but this trick always works. Warning, this doesn't mean you have to pretend you're engaged or show yourself on social media with all the men you know. Simply let it get to your ears that you are leading a peaceful, busy life and show yourself truly happy, open to new acquaintances and at peace with yourself.
Even a few photos on Instagram posing with male friends can be a good idea to whet the jealousy of your ex who, you know, is always lurking.
8. Reopen contacts by focusing on common interests
If you happen to talk or if you feel the need to contact him again after a while, you can do so starting from aspects and topics that bind you, perhaps precisely from the common interests that you shared during your relationship.
But how do you have to behave in this case, even if he were to contact you?
- be calm, serene and not too keen to see him
- try not to show resentment or anger
- do not let him understand that you would do anything to get back to him: keep yours, courteous, kind but not too affectionate
- let him know in a natural and not too forced way that your life is progressing and that you are fine
The next steps will determine whether or not it will be appropriate to expose yourself a little more, even looking at his moves. At the moment, however, do not exaggerate with the manifestations of affection and desire: let yourself be sought and desired.
9. Recreate engagement by focusing on the things he loved about you
If the contacts continue, try to emphasize aspects of you that he loved during your relationship, avoiding instead reactions that led you to misunderstandings or arguments.
And if you talk about the end of your relationship, be calm and rational, also assuming your responsibilities if necessary. Seeing you mature and detached can only intrigue him even more. Furthermore, by doing so, you will also allow him to express himself freely without fear of hurting you or destabilizing you and you will be able to better understand what his intentions are and if there are real possibilities to get back together and win him back.
10. Be honest anyway, yourself, don't pretend
While we've no doubt suggested a few tricks, remember that you still have to be yourself. Do not change for him, do not distort yourself, even in that case, the relationship, if it were to resume, would still not be successful.
If you are not appreciated for who you are and you feel compelled to change part of you for pleasure, then it means that it is not your person, and someone else better will come. Arm yourself with patience, be confident and think positive - you will attract the right person.