The Oedipus complex: symptoms and meaning of Freud's theory
Meaning of the Oedipus complex
The Oedipus complex, which occurs between the ages of two and a half and seven, is the unconscious rejection of the parent of one's sex, due to a loving projection towards the parent of the opposite sex. This phase resolves itself, with a "progressive identification with the parent of one's sex.
The origin of the concept: the myth of Oedipus and Electra
The Oedipus complex has been identified, as regards male subjects, by Sigmund Freud, the father of psychoanalysis, in reference to Sophocles' tragedy, Oedipus the king, inspired by a Greek myth of oral tradition. Abandoned at birth, Oedipus kills his father, whom he does not know, and marries his mother, without knowing the true identity of the woman. For girls, as anticipated, the complex expression of Electra is also used, from the name of the Greek heroine who killed her mother, Clytemnestra, to avenge her father Agamemnon.
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How does the Oedipus complex manifest itself? Symptoms of Freud's Theory
Towards the age of three, or two and a half years, the child becomes possessive towards the mother, asking for more cuddles and tenderness. She can also try to intrude on the parents' sexual intimacy by, for example, entering their room without knocking. As for girls, this phase corresponds to the moment in which they try to win over their father and continually attract his attention, while the girl mother becomes, at the same time, a rival and a model. Freud calls it the phallic phase, since the child, in the process of discovering his own body, understands that the penis is an important element in the intimacy of his parents, from which he however it is excluded.
Not succeeding in these unconscious maneuvers of seduction, often the child, between three and five years old, will suffocate his own opposition, which will end up expressing itself through attacks of anger and nightmares. Freud defines this phase as complex of castration, because in front of his own desire, the child thinks that the punishment inflicted by the father is right.
How do you get out of the Oedipus complex? Generally, between 5 and 7 years, one passes through a phase called resolutive by Freud, during which the child will renounce taking the place of the parent of his own sex, rejecting his emotions and passions in his own unconscious.
In fact, around the age of five or six, the age begins when girls want to imitate their mothers and when children are happy to adopt behaviors similar to those of their fathers and to share activities with him. These behaviors concretely sanction the overcoming of the Oedipus complex and the entry into a new phase that will accompany the child's growth and his correct psychological approach towards the father and mother figure.
How to react to the Oedipus complex? Parental behavior
A key moment for the development of sexuality and personality of each individual, the Oedipus complex is a normal phase, which however requires special attention from the parents. It is necessary to explain to the child, who can become aggressive, that he will never be able to marry neither with his father, nor with his mother, but that he will find another person with whom he can do what his parents do.
The father's authority has the task of setting limits with respect to the wishes of the child: it helps the child to make her understand that she will not be able to have the same type of relationship with her father as he has with her mother, and it allows the child to clarify the type of relationship that must have with the mother. The parent towards whom the child's aggression temporarily turns, must continue as if nothing had happened, while the preferred parent must take every opportunity to value the other so as to gradually bring him into a situation of conceptual clarity and emotional serenity, fundamental for his future psychological life and relationship. Do not be overwhelmed by feelings of guilt and anxiety in this phase of defining limits and boundaries, it is a normal step to take, useful for the future life of your child and the acquisition of a defined and usual self. Here are some tips to manage the better the situation.
The unsolved Oedipus complex: the consequences on the unsolved adult
According to Freud, in the growth of a child, an unsolved Oedipus complex would be at the origin of most psychic disorders. Often, in fact, in adulthood, the difficult search for a partner, and a consequent problematic relationship, arises precisely from an unsolved relationship with the parent of the opposite sex. In this case, we are talking about a failed Oedipus complex. Idealization, repressed anger, inability to communicate and hidden tensions accumulated over time can determine a difficulty in approaching the opposite sex that arises from a relationship that is far from resolved with the mother or, in the case of the Electra complex, with the father.
However, this complex seems to exist only in a nuclear family (father, mother and children living under the same roof): the emergence of new family forms (single-parent, homoparental) leads modern psychoanalysis to consider other cases, in which the paternal or maternal figure is absent, or divided between two men or two women. Cases such as these show the urgency of revising the psychoanalytic scheme of the Oedipus complex, which scientific criticism has been questioning for many years now, also with regard to families of the classical type, with father, mother and child.
