Loss of desire: how to do?
Be calm!
This decrease (or absence) of desire doesn't have to scare you. It is frequent and does not mean that you have taken a one way ticket for Nosexland. Very often it is a phase of stasis that happens to most women and in very specific periods of existence. But be careful, it is important to act immediately to break the vicious circle that could become irreversible. You must understand the origin of this block. to manage it better and find the right solution. First of all, don't forget the benefits of making love (or remind your partner):
Clinical factors of decreased desire
You don't even think about it, but your decreased desire may have a physiological cause. A complete check-up by the doctor becomes, therefore, necessary to identify a "possible medical origin or a possible health problem to avoid the long-term effects of a" stopped sexual activity.
- An important hormonal shift it can cause libido to drop. It is important to consult your doctor, who will do a blood test to identify and possibly restore any hormonal problem.
- Also there pill can have some influence on cravings if it is not the one that suits you. Again, your doctor may prescribe a more suitable oral contraceptive or another contraceptive.
- DrugsSome of them, such as antidepressants, tranquilizers or other treatments, may explain this decreased desire. Very often, it is enough to suspend their administration, obviously under the control of a specialist, to make sure that the problem is solved.
- The Depression: it is a real disease that is often accompanied by a decrease in desire that affects all areas. And in particular the sexual one. It can be caused by emotional trauma or come on its own, with no obvious cause. It must be avoided that it installs: it is important to speak quickly to someone and to your doctor who will recommend a specialist, to arrive at a diagnosis and find an appropriate therapy.
© istock.
Decline in desire: psychological factors
- Fatigue and the stress: these are two key and very frequent elements that often cause a decrease in desire. The solution is simple: you have to be patient. Patient especially with yourself. You have to take care of yourself, relativize the origins of your stress, you have to pamper yourself, avoid overdoing it. And most importantly, you don't have to feel guilty. The fact that you don't want to make love stresses you even more, it's a vicious circle. Give yourself time and, with your partner, indulge in pampering moments that can make desire reappear. Organize a weekend getaway with your man, disconnecting any connection with the outside world.
- A significant event: the loss of a job, the death of a loved one, a move, a break in love are situations that can eliminate sex appeal. These types of emotional disturbances are capable of upsetting you and causing your desire to drop. However, you need to stay calm and learn to accept that this drop in libido is part of the post-traumatic process. If it lasts too long, and you feel like you could sink into a depressive state, don't hesitate and see a doctor.
- Relationship problems: While some find quarrels particularly exciting, for most of us the conflict situations reduce the desire for the other. Arguments, arguments, disagreements or the confession of a betrayal end up damaging relationships and desire to get closer physically Fortunately, most conflicts are not eternal Try to restore some calm between you and have a pleasant time with your partner in order to regain the pleasure of being together.
And don't forget the advantages of making peace "under the sheets" ... And who knows if, in reality, the tensions did not come from this "lack of contact between you? Good to know: if the conflicts with your partner are too deep and serious, a little sex won't fix them.Perhaps you should think about couples therapy.
- Bad self-image: a few extra pounds, a phase of general listlessness, a professional failure… and you feel really unsexy. If you don't feel good about yourself, you won't even want to share intimate moments with another person, even if they don't see the little flaws that paralyze you. Learn to love yourself and things will get better in all areas. A balanced diet, some sport, some shopping, a break from the hairdresser, another from the beautician ... take care of your body and yourself and really listen to the compliments they give you. your libido will follow it.
- Oblivion: the days, the weeks go by and, if there were no one to remind you that it is healthy and natural, you would only think about it from time to time. The absence of stimuli can silence the desire. Hugs, caresses, erotic fantasies, the sending of slightly mischievous SMS ... in a nutshell, look for new sources of inspiration. Little by little, abandon yourself to the awakening of the senses.
How to manage this decline if you are in a couple?
Be honest. Do not invent false pretexts, it would be useless and, besides, nobody likes to be made fun of. You would just postpone the problem without solving it. Explain to your partner that it is nothing personal, that it is momentary; suggest to your partner the way in which, in your opinion, can help you to make the situation evolve. Ask him to be more inspiring, to go back to the romance of the beginning. You can also simply ask him to be a little patient. But please don't ever resort to the headache excuse. Not only does no one believe it anymore, but it is now well known that an orgasm can make every migraine disappear.
Indeed, when the desire returns fiery, we advise you to deepen these positions to achieve it