Small survival guide for family celebrations
Christmas, such a magical and romantic moment for some and a real torment for others.
Although the streets are brightly lit and ours are literally haunted by the voice of Mariah Carey, not all of us are ready to welcome the spirit of Christmas with open arms and spend peaceful, long days at the table at the mercy of relatives and their questions. .
The family, even when it is very close, is often difficult to manage.
So here's a little guide to help you overcome negative thoughts and take the holidays a step further.
And if you get to know your in-laws for the first time this year, here are some tips:
Think positive
The holidays, after all, are not an unsustainable disaster but also (and above all) a moment of rest and sharing in which we are surrounded by affection, memories and lots of good food. In short, there are worse days during the year! Try to focus on the positive aspects and remember that it is a matter of a few days and above all a few hours!
If you live far away from yours, you are probably used to having your own rhythms and habits and often, going home for the holidays puts you in tension, but think about those moments when you are so homesick for your home and loved ones. . It's always nice to have a chat with the grandfather or help mum prepare lunch. Not to mention the bickering between brothers who in the end are the ones we remember with so much tenderness.
Rest and think about how long you wait for the holidays to disconnect a little from everyday life.
A little tip? Also do a social detox: focus on your life and on what you have that is beautiful. There is no point in fumbling for hours on other people's vacation photos.
See also
Politics & co.
Although strongly discouraged, the "political" topic often pops up during family lunches.
And even more often one of the diners has completely opposite ideas to yours.
We know how difficult it can be, especially when it comes to personal issues like homosexuality, immigration or abortion.
When tempers light up in discussions about politics, try to defuse the tension.
Some people get impetuous when it comes to talking about the government and the table becomes a real stadium. It is right to discuss but if your interlocutor is unwilling to listen, try not to raise your voice and conclude with a phrase like "I have a lot of respect for your ideas, but I think I remain faithful to mine". Sometimes you have to lead by example
That mother-in-law monster
Sometimes it's not just commonplace. Sometimes your sweetheart's mom really makes you nervous!
Somehow, despite having been in a couple for years, your mother-in-law wants to mark the territory: it is she who cooks best, it is she and only she who understands her children with a look and then, how intrusive she is! He always wants to know where you are and what you do. He has to say about your job, how you dress and when you should have a child, in short, your mother-in-law is a nightmare.
Unfortunately, in these cases, know that the only effective solution to face the Christmas lunch in a serene way, is to talk about it with your other half. After all we are talking about his parents who will always be important and present in your life. That's why you can outline boundaries that the terrible mother-in-law must never cross It is up to your partner to help you handle such a delicate situation!
via GIPHY
Once a year
"Christmas with your family, Easter with whoever you want" says the wise man. But add the days before and after Christmas too!
When you are an adult it is absolutely normal to want to spend moments of celebration and rest to be alone or with friends. We are still talking about a party and not a kidnapping and if you hate those lunches that last practically half a day, find a compromise with the rest of the family: as soon as you finish eating, everyone must be free to do what they want. It's true, it's once a year and despite everything you love your family and even your mother-in-law but ... after a year of work and trains late and a 6-hour lunch spent dodging thorny arguments you deserve to hear, for the thirtieth consecutive year, the likeable uncle who shouts "Bingo!" at the first number drawn.
